March | MTF Training Exercise #3
Once reality sets in that the sun may not come up after December 21, people are bound to break down and go into a disgusting, embarrassing fit of crying. You know the kind I'm talking about, the kind where a grown man cries so hard he starts slobbering and spitting everywhere. It's truly disappointing and tough to watch, but you're going to see this more and more as we get closer to "the end."
When the emotion of fear takes over, we recommend taking a "Chill Pill," which we graciously provide you with this month. Don't get us wrong. We know you're one cool cat. Clearly, you never break down or crack under pressure. You're a seasoned pro. But, it will be helpful to have Chill Pills on hand when you encounter those who simply cannot handle the pressure. It's now your job to convert the non-functioning to the fully-functioning. The good news is the pills work quickly! Not only will it calm those incapable of handling stress and pressure, but it will also leave them with surprisingly fresh breath!
Chill Pill Facts
- It's recommended to take doses in increments of prime numbers.
- The more Chill Pills you cram into someone's mouth, the less likely they'll be able to talk, and therefore complain…
- Chill Pills contain mostly sugar and a little bit of natural Powermint flavoring.
- Chill Pills are also marketed worldwide under the "Tic Tac" brand name. They are completely safe. Unless you can't have sugar…or Powermint flavoring.
- Natural Powermint flavoring is derived from mint plants that have successfully completed the P90X workout program before they are harvested.
- These statements have not been verified by the FDA.
- Seek medical help if your fresh breath lasts longer than 4 hours.
- Chill pills have not been tested on laboratory animals. …And we don't mean that in a good way…